Friday, January 11, 2008

Notes on the FOX News Republican South Carolina Debate

Ugh, *gasp*, ...burnout - 2 more Republican Debates, 3 more Democratic Debates before the conventions. This is getting tired.

So for those of you who don't want to dig down into the bullet points, here's the short short version: McCain drones racist, Thompson whips Huckabee, Huckabee says "gates of hell," Romney can't say "Ahmadinejad," everybody laughs at Ron Paul, no one will acknowledge what a benchmark in Iraq is, and the flashy background lights and Wendell Goler's tie distracted viewers from all of it.

Oh, and Ronald Reagan.

...and here's those witty bullet points you all so love:
  • While I'm glad to see that they haven't shut out Ron Paul for good, I'm disturbed by the recent reports of decades of racist newsletters published under his name.

  • The anti-Huckabee ad never showed. :(

  • McCain's tone is so droning that he rendered 30% of the FOX audience comatose and paramedics lined up stage left should he slip into a coma himself.

  • Note to Giuliani: "oversuing" is not a word or a reality - the only people who want tort reform are the medical insurance companies and the tools who are wrapped around their various appendages.

  • Thompson with the big guns, goes down the line on why Huckabee's version of the Reagan Coalition is the policy of the Democratic Party. Ooh, snap. Too bad he's about 4 months too late in gaining a pulse.

  • Huckabee on Iran pseudo-scuffle: The enemy should set their sites on the American ship, then know that the next thing they will see "will be the gates of Hell." Did you really just...yes you did.

  • Distractions - Stop the twinkle lights in the background and tell Wendell Goler to tone down the Zebra Stripe Gum tie. I'm trying to watch a debate, not slip into an epileptic fit. Granted, with McCain's monotone, it was one of the few things keeping me conscious.

  • Ron Paul points out the Bush Administration's saber-rattling, how they were disappointed in the NIE, and how we need to be way careful before pushing the Iran Go button. Hume makes snide comment about direct question he had asked another candidate and everyone has a laugh at Ron Paul. Ron Paul is apparently not in the Ronald Reagan Club.

  • Note to Romney: If you want to be The Leader of the Free World, you might want to practice the names of other leaders in the world, like "Ahmadinejad."

  • Note to McCain as old-fashioned sexist: it's not 1953 anymore. Time appoints a "Person of the Year," not "Man of the Year."

  • Note McCain as new-world racist: Saying you don't want to trade with Al Qaeda because they only want to trade burqas, and don't want to travel with them because they only buy one-way tickets might be seen as inflammatory to anyone with a sense for such things. Ass.

  • McCain has "the greatest respect and affection for" Giuliani. Did you mean "admiration" or can we look forward to a the McCain/Giuliani version of Madonna/Britney. Pop culture nuance note: McCain will also French kiss Thompson; no one will remember.

  • Carl Cameron to Ron Paul: " you have any?" Carl Cameron is a dick.

  • Nitpicking Huckabee on referencing Hispanics as "some of the ones." Some might see that as dehumanizing minorities. Non-whites are people too.

  • Thompson's post interview summed up the overall view of how the Iraq Surge is a winner: "The only benchmark is success." I would've gone with the 9/18 benchmarks; at least there you get 50%.
So another debate dies and we breathe deeply before January 15th's Democratic debate, if it's aired. I guess I'll figure that out by then. Cheers!

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