I'm feeling a little brash today, a little like sticking it out there and just declaring once and for all that I do have a favorite, and ultimate of some for or another. So let's get this over with.
Favorite Song: White Rabbit - Jefferson Airplane
Funniest Animated Show Ever: Frisky Dingo
Funniest Movie Ever: BASEketball
Favorite Movie: True Romance
There we go. I feel better.
Saturday, May 01, 2010
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Because nothing says "Check out my pimp rims!" like a children's fairy tale.
And this van either sells ice cream or rape. I guess it could be both.
This week's apparent theme: luring children into dangerous situations. How unfortunate.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
I'd say "Only in Cincinnati" but I think you can probably find such absurdity Ohio-wide.
MIDDLETOWN - Over the incessant barking of half a dozen small dogs, Sgt. Steve Ream couldn't believe what he saw inside a Beech Street house.
On a bed with the dogs was a woman, with "one large white parrot... standing on her forehead, biting her in the face. There was another smaller bird on her chest."
This was in addition to as many as 10 cages with other birds, all of them squawking and causing the dogs to bark. The woman appeared to be so intoxicated, Ream said, "that she could not remove the bird off her face."
The Friday night run started as a domestic disturbance, a man and a wife who had been drinking and arguing so loudly that neighbors had gotten involved.
Ream then took Janice McCoy-Nuttle, 49, to the front porch, because "I couldn't understand what she was trying to say due to the dogs barking and other noise."
She denied that her husband, Kevin Nuttle, who was outside the house with a bleeding ear, had been assaulted.
It would have ended there, Ream wrote in his report, but McCoy-Nuttle got angry at her husband, swore at him and threw an inhaler at him, nearly striking the officer.
Ream then put her in the back of his cruiser, and wrote that she kicked at the windows and banged her head on the bars. At the police station, where she had to be restrained, she was charged with disorderly conduct with intoxication.
The couple had been celebrating Nuttle's return after four months on the road as a truck driver.
McCoy-Nuttle was later found guilty in Middletown Municipal Court and fined $240.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Last week, many people - including myself - were up in arms about the Comedy Central bullshit where they censored not only the "image" of Mohammed, but in part 2 (episode 201), bleeped every time the name Mohammed was used bleeped over the entire final speech. (Even though Season 5's "Super Best Friends" can still be found with a normally-illustrated Mohammed and no fanfare whatsoever - but that was before 9/11 when the terrorists apparently did win 'cause dey scurred us.)
And everybody, especially the Christians, were outraged at the double standard imposed in the world of religion.
One guy I heard on one of my right-wing AM masochism sessions actually said "Islam is the only religion you can't make fun of."
Yeah, so fuck that, right? Everyone else has a great sense of humor, let's it roll off their back like piss on a duck, right?
Not so fast there, Catholics. A fake memo, circulated by a 23-year old satirist - admittedly as a joke - is getting a lot of attention this week. What was in it?
The memorandum, apparently written by staff planning events for the four-day visit by Pope Benedict XVI, suggested he might like to start a helpline for abused children, sack "dodgy" bishops, open an abortion ward, launch his own brand of condoms, preside at a civil partnership, perform forward rolls with children, apologise for the Spanish armada and sing a song with the Queen.
And the Pope flipped the fuck out in usual sanctimonious bullshit mode. The tempest in a teacup was jumped on by all the Catholic myrmidons in the western world and called anything from "despicable" to "a foolish document." The Pope's visit to the UK is in jeopardy and the Vatican wants to know why no one's been sacked yet.
Oh, for fuck's sake! I agree that death threats over depictions of Mohammed, innocuous or not, are total bullshit. But you, you hypocritical Catholics, glom on to that bullhorn in one breath and in the very next are calling for the hounds of hell to pluck this satire-driven man from the face of the earth for comments that oscillate between mildly humorous and trite!
So the WTF Award goes to the Pope. Again. Though this whole thing could've been a bit of a ruse to kill the UK trip all together. Everyone knows Richard Dawkins is going to arrest the Pope as soon as he sets foot in the UK. You know, that whole religion-wide molestation coverup thing?
And one last note on the Mohammed South Park debacle. It's prompted at least one cartoonist to declare May 20th, 2010 "Everybody Draw Mohammed Day" in defense of Matt Stone and Trey Parker.
However, following the mad viral reaction of the internets over her cartoon, has disassociated herself with the movement and the cartoon, and many links can be found in this story from Facebook groups to where to submit your drawing for May 20.
I'll be posting my own graven image and encourage you to do the same. Maybe one of Jesus too. And the Pope. And Krishna. And Buddha. Then it's fair ;)