Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Just a Few Questions

Do men with larger penises seek out smaller women so they look even bigger in perspective? Do men with smaller penises do the same thing?

(Congratulations! You are Queen of the Giant Cock Tower!)

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If Jesus and Mary Magdalene ever really nailed it, do you think it was weird for Jesus to call out his mom's name when he came?

(Oh Mary, Mary, quite contrary... Mom - oh, shit...sorry...give me a minute. I swear this almost never happens.)

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Would Dick Cheney consider it torture if someone pulled his dick through the middle of a CD and showed him porn?

(You'll never get me hard - oh, shit, is that torture video? Shit!)

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If it wasn't for the Laserdisc, would Compact Discs (CDs) have been called CDs? Would we just call them Ds?

(Hey, what Ds you pick up at FYE today? / Dude, I burn my Ds from tha internets; nobody buys them anymore.)

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Are you disappointed that the last question was not also about penises in some form?

(And what form should those penises take? Discuss.)

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Are Canadian lesbians more Canadian because they eat beaver?

(Nothing to see here folks; that was just terrible.)

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If God created ALL things and evangelicals say he did not create evil, how do you rectify that argument?

(He "allows" evil, of course! / But if he didn't create it, how does it exist? / Begone Satan!)

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The CDC is now saying every child from 6 mo to 18 years get a flu vaccine; do you believe the hype?

(Hype my ass, daddy gov't needs to pay the bills and scarin' the public and fuckin' the vaccine folks gets that done. Kinda.)

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Do I have too many questions?

(Please check yes or no.)

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Does this post have anything to do with the fact that I'm dangerously close to 1000 posts?

(Smack that 1K, bitch. That's right. Smack it like you mean it!)

5 comments:

Megan said...

Well, how close are you?

Ricky Shambles said...

965 published posts as of yesterday's van mural Wednesday.

Randal Graves said...

This post isn't going to turn me into a Canadian lesbian, is it?

Freida Bee said...

This post did not contain enough penises.

Ricky Shambles said...

Randal - I believe that's a question for Calvin's Canadian Cave.

Freida - Sorry, I only have 2 hands :S