Wednesday, May 02, 2012

My First Heartbreak: Firestar

Warning: sappy content herein.

From 1981-1983, NBC Saturday Morning aired an animated show Spiderman and His Amazing Friends. I was five or six at the time, but I loved it: Spidey was always a quick-quipping badass, Iceman was, well, he made fucking ice out of his hands, and then there was Firestar. *le sigh*

I was absolutely head over heels in love with Firestar. I was many years away from feelings of sexual attraction, but somehow felt such a desire, such an affinity towards the character, that it made a lasting impression on me, even at such a young age.

I specifically remember my father - working for the local NBC affiliate at the time - brought home a 5x7 promo glossy of the three heroes sliding / slinging / flying in action. And me: just staring at Firestar, alone in my room, until my emotive threshold met up with my realism that she was a cartoon and the awesome adoration exuding from my eyes turned to tears as I truly realized I would never be able to experience her beauty/persona personally. I cried myself to sleep that night.

Firestar had broken my heart.

And it's probably 90% of the reason I have a thing for redheads.

And I look back on that as a magical time of sorts, because at its core, it was pure, not an overwhelming desire to possess, but just to know more, comprehend more. And a despair that came with the inability.

Years later, I still see a little bit of that pull to know an inner beauty in every person I meet, though it only gets intense enough to tear up when I stare at the clouds or the Hubble Deep Field.

Beauty is in everything. And, in a sense, love is too. And I think I'm concluding that a cartoon character opened my mind to both and handed me the tools to appreciate them at just the right age to become the person I am today.


SOL's view said...

Beauty and love are in everything I look at ... on particular days. Found in Spring. When the sky is blue, the clouds fluffy white, the breeze stirs the grass and my soul rises to the heights of euphoria.

On all other days I'm just 'meh'. Unless I stand in the city and stare up at the clouds passing behind the tall buildings and see how long I can do that without falling over. :D

Alas, I don't remember Firestar. I remember Spidey though. Sunday papers, Spiderman. Win.

Pearl said...

There IS beauty everywhere.

It's just not always easy to see it.



Megan said...

You were five in 1981? Wow, I was way off.

Ricky Shambles said...

I knew I missed commenting back here. Thanks SOL & Pearl!

Megan- How off? In what direction? :)