Obama McCain Debate - End Retch!

No more Red Bull before public appearances. Please.

So last night.

Yeah.

McCain v.3.9.00.21 was interesting.

What did we learn? That McCain's abnormally stiff thumbs (he was a P.O.W., you know), must be a favorite of Cindy's, and that John's jaw harbors a parasitic twin.

In the picture above, it's the very end of the debate, McCain actually shook Obama's hand - frantically and vigorously - and is bouncing back and forth like a pinball to figure out how to get to the other side of a relatively small table in order to shake Bob Schieffer's hand. My guess: Adderall and three Jäger-Bombs. The freeze frame will probably be spun by the right as a "good-natured show of exasperation."

This was my favorite moment of the debate and reminded me of that one relative at a family reunion - let's call him Uncle John - who is always just a dick. Then one day, either by Aunt Cindy's nagging or a spontaneous, genuine effort to not be a dick, Uncle John shows up and he's smiling, and he chuckles, and he even sticks out his tongue in this goofy show of exasperation. But something's off. He twitches a little. See, Uncle John has spent so much of his life being a dick that when he tries to to be genuinely good-natured, it just comes across as a socially awkward, fabricated facade that, ultimately, only serves to amplify the fact that Uncle John will never be anything but a dick.

And if you missed it, last night's unidentifiable noise was the death rattle of the McCain campaign.

Full point-by-point will appear at All Things Democrat later today.