Monday, October 15, 2007

Gay Vatican Official "Not Gay"

Jumpin' Jesus on a pogo stick, for the love of Larry Craig! From the Yahoo:
A Vatican official suspended after being caught on hidden camera making advances to a young man says he is not gay and was only pretending to be gay as part of his work.

In an interview published Sunday, Monsignor Tommaso Stenico told La Repubblica daily he frequented online gay chat rooms and met with gay men as part of his work as a psychoanalyst. He said that he pretended to be gay in order to gather information about "those who damage the image of the Church with homosexual activity."

AP Image

For fuck's sake, look at the man! You don't even need to see video of him for a Level 5 Gaydar alarm (Beep! Beep! Dive! Dive! Going down!) - I can feel his eyes on my shoulders and my ass through the internets, his Italian sibilance echoes like a boy's choir in my ears longing to dash me on the rocks like the Siren daughters of Achelous, the cut of his jib longing for hot, steaming man meat.

But he was just pretending.

[Note: Homosexuality is not pedophelia and vice versa; please do not confuse the two. The Catholic Church demands celibacy, and for a high-ranking Vatican official to be trolling the internets for gay sex and using his office to caress a man's thigh is abuse of his station and his power. Denying it sticks him in the same closet as Larry Craig.]

He, above all, should know: If you're in the Vatican and going to "pretend" to be gay in some sort of top-secret save-the-world mission, you should probably document that somewhere, maybe with a superior, perhaps with the signature or mushroom stamp of the Pope. If not, you're just begging for it. And boy, was he begging for it.

You know what they say: If it looks like a duck and acts like a duck, it's probably a gay priest.

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