Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Imperial Stars, Fuck You


There's this band, Imperial Stars. They had a meeting 2 weeks ago with their PR team that probably went something like this:
IS:So what's the next big stunt, the next big thing?

PR-Co.: Okay, follow me here. You've got that song Traffic Jam 101

IS: Yeah, cause we, like, party like rock stars every chance we get, like even in a traffic jam, holmes.

PR: Right, so it's Traffic Jam 101. So you "cause" a traffic jam on the 101, but it's really like a free show and - BAM! - it's a free concert flash mob all rolled into one!

IS: Bomb diggidy. We'll send you a check.
So these asshats drove up the 101 in their big ol' Imperial Stars truck this morning and around Sunset Blvd. pulled a sideways stop, blocking 3 lanes, and started performing their song, Traffic Jam 101.

If anyone has had the unfortunate experience of driving the 101 in LA, any time day or night it's a goddamned mess, a powder keg ready to explode. And these guys took it to a standstill. It's a good thing the cops showed up because they'd probably be dead. And all this to sing a shitty song about partying all the time. Earth to Imperial Stars: Lots of things happen on the 101 - swearing, smoking, horn-honking, sweating, brief pit-stops - but none of those things is partying.

For their next PR gig, the Imperial Stars will make every line in every Starbucks 8 people longer all the time, extend the pain of kidney stones to the entire body, and make rape 50% more humiliating.

I can't even imagine the people who might've lost a job or missed an interview or wasn't there to pick up their kid.

Imperial Stars: FUCK YOU.

Oh, and if you're so morbidly curious that you must - absolutely must - see their video, here it is for you in all its misery. I suggest NO, but I know you will. But really: don't.

Seriously: this isn't something put together by the Dick in a Box folks? This is a real band? Deplorable.


Pearl said...

Would you believe I clicked?

STUPIDEST thing I've seen today. Is this really a band?! They suck!


Debra She Who Seeks said...

I hope they have to pay the cost of the police presence they necessitated. Why should the taxpayer pay for their publicity stunt?

Ricky Shambles said...

Pearl, I guess they are :(

Debra - I believe they were arrested. I hope they are violated in prison, but first they must get out on bond to make rape 50% more humiliating.