Sunday, May 10, 2009

Thoughts For Sunday: Caffine, Energy, Mustard, and Bible Hate

Friday night I bought a 12 of Miller Lite. The caps have now gone gold and are being touted as flavor savers or some shit. I think we all know it just means Miller Lite has gone caffeine-free.

I believe a leaf blower is a horrible affront to our environment, wasting gas or electricity to do something a little elbow grease and a rake can do.

(tell me you get this)

Also, I cannot afford a leaf blower.

I'm making meatloaf right now for my wife on Mother's day. I used a recipe that did not have measurements and I added too much mustard. I'm hoping it will be okayh. But it means that I've been spending the past hour, on Mother's Day, wondering if I cut the mustard enough.

If you're ever listening to someone spout Bible Hate about homosexuals, please remind them that Leviticus 18:22 says "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination." but Leviticus 19:19 says "...neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee" and ask them if they're wearing a blend.

That is all.


Anonymous said...

[It's still legal - and always God-honoring - to air messages like the following. (See Ezekiel 3:18-19.) In light of government backing of raunchy behavior (such offenders were even executed in early America!), maybe the separation we really need is the "separation of raunch and state"!]

In Luke 17 in the New Testament, Jesus said that one of the big "signs" that will happen shortly before His return to earth as Judge will be a repeat of the "days of Lot" (see Genesis 19 for details). So gays are actually helping to fulfill this same worldwide "sign" (and making the Bible even more believable!) and thus hurrying up the return of the Judge! They are accomplishing what many preachers haven't accomplished! Gays couldn't have accomplished this by just coming out of closets into bedrooms. Instead, they invented new architecture - you know, closets opening on to Main Streets where little kids would be able to watch naked men having sex with each other at festivals in places like San Francisco (where their underground saint - San Andreas - may soon get a big jolt out of what's going on over his head!). Thanks, gays, for figuring out how to bring back our resurrected Saviour even quicker!

Bill Stankus said...

Leaf blowers are OK. Two things they do very nicely.

1. They're great for getting leaves out and off areas covered with gravel.

2. They're noisy so when a nutjob religious peddler or creationist comes a calling and I'm outside blowing leaves off my gravel driveway, I can't hear a thing they say.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

I'm not a leaf blower but I support your right to blow leafs.

Ricky Shambles said...

Anon: if San Andreas is an underground saint, does that make him a C.H.U.D.? The ancient and piecemeal book you quote makes it nothing more than worshiped fairy tales.

Bill, quite true! Monkey, I appreciate your nonjudgmental support.

Freida Bee, MD said...

Leaf blowers (not the cutie in the blue- as anon insinuates)are an abomination of nature. Topsoil, one of our most important natural resources, is dwindling and we haul off the best thing we could allow our land to have, her natural mulch.

BTW- Just saw the movie Special with your adopted son there, and it was hilarious!