Romney Goes Legit 2 Quit

That's the logo. Apparently toothpaste is his thing. I smell nanny state and Romneycare and sister wives colliding with America. You know, those "true ideals" that non-Mormon conservatives change every six months.

Not sure what's suckier: the shitty branding or (if you look at the source code) that he chose to bring his message to America in a low-rent Wordpress template (ooh, probably the same source, a cousin perchance? who took this one course this one time on websites and totally can program and stuff?). Basic PR calls for custom design, programming, SEO, and that's just on the web side! Looks like he started his campaign by creating a job ...for an intern.


Sorry: Edit: Believe in America? Um, we already do. Thanks. Obama's message of Hope worked because many of us lost that with Bush. The left, the right, the gun-toting living bibles? We all believe in America. Well, our version. So, wait, what's Mitt's version of America? Mormon intifada? Sister Wives Sharia Law? Hell, we'll just get Glenn on Fox to expose... Holy Shit! He quit (was fired) and he's Mormon too!

What fresh torture have we just entered? What of Satan's carnal jubilation have we awoken? This is hell-jizz territory. Get a hat.

Sen. George Voinovich (R-OH) is a Blind Moron

I saw a note on a blog the other day noting that George Voinovich's Contact Page had no mention of Unemployment or Jobs. I checked it out and - okay, you already believe it - in the "Topic" you'd want to choose as the subject of your communication, there is absolutely no choice for...oh, hell, let's just list all of Sen. Douchebag's choices here for us to all ponder over, shall we?

.....HOT TOPICS.....
Associated Health Plans
Broadcast Decency Act
Gas Prices
Internet Neutrality
National Security
Same Sex Marriage
School Voucher Program
Social Security
Terrorism
War In Iraq
.....CONSTITUENT SERVICES.....
Casework
Flag Request
Service Academy Nominations
Tour Request
.....GENERAL TOPICS.....
Abortion
Agriculture
Banking-General
Budget
Children's Issues
Communications
Defense-General
Economy-General
Education
Energy
Environment
Foreign Affairs
Government Affairs
Health Care-General
Housing
Immigration
Intelligence Issues
Judiciary
Labor
Nuclear Weapons
Seniors' Issues
Small Business
Tax-General
Trade-General
Transportation
Veterans Affairs
Other

We start with HOT TOPICS. Read: Scary, right-wing talking points. I'm surprised "Them Niggers is Votin'!" isn't listed. Case in point? "Internet Neutrality" The only people talking about it are right wing radio nutters who are bald-face lying about its basic definition (and probably calling it that when anyone in the know calls it "Net Neutrality" - alliteration anyone?). Everyone else knows Neutrality is what we have now. And I'm guessing his topic is not listed to quell the mis-directed "Obama Ownz Da Internets" shoutings of his idiot-driven constituency.

We can skip the services. Meh.

But now that we've seen that the HOT TOPICS (that don't include Voinovich getting all Goth/Emo on us) did NOT include anything about job security or unemployment, then it MUST be in the General Topics, no?

Um, no. Oh, you could choose "Banking-General" 'cause you don't have no money in it, or Budget because when paycheck-to-paycheck turns to unemployment-check-to-unemployment-check turns to "maybe I should rob that aforementioned bank," that might work. But then you might choose Banking-General again.

You could pick Economy-General because Ohio's has been tanking since the 80's with a weak 90's jump and the whole state's missing the latest jump shot in Lebron's rape of Cleveland. You could pick Defense-General because you might choose a rifle over gas in the car as your jobless neighbors become squatters then homeless and the homeless move in to become squatters next door; though that might be Housing. You could pick Children's Issues because the kids are starving because there are no jobs and no money.

What you cannot pick, when trying to contact Senator George Voinovich, is a category labeled "Jobs" or "Unemployment." But maybe because there are no jobs and unemployment's run out for many, he finds it irrelevant. Maybe Georgie figures poor people don't have access to computers or the internet and therefore can't email him. Or maybe he thinks since Obama controls the internets, it's not worth his time.

Republicans don't get humor or technology or compassion and that's fine. I understand that. I don't get why they keep getting elected, but that's a whole nother post.

The Republican Senator of the State of Ohio - a state that is over the 10% mark in unemployment - is missing "Unemployment" or "Jobs" or "Job Creation" or "Joblessness" as a BASIC category of communication online. How fucking out of touch with your constituency must you be to have "Internet Neutrality" in the HOT TOPIC section and not even mention that 10% of working adults...are NOT working? Are the expensive suits and great hotels and extreme taxpayer-paid vacations and fabulous homes all giving you a rich-man brain-wash enema? Because you and the rest of the Republicans are completely ignoring the jobless in our country, you've done NOTHING to create jobs in Ohio (and shitting every Democrat idea is technically LESS than nothing), and yet you yodel about breaking taxes for the fucking RICH! (I'm guessing you're on the "that pays for itself" shovels o' bullshit wagon.)

The Republicans are not going to "win" anything in the fall, Senator V. And that's a shame, because they've already lost their souls in arguing for the last two years against everything compassionate and progressive (as in "helping the human condition progress") while offering no real solutions except to say the other guy is wrong. You're going to lose because you keep shouting "budget" and "deficit" but we all know you raped those things under W. And now you're backtracking, while vomiting platitudes of feces out your mouths. But you don't - and never will - get it. People don't care about bigger economic bullshit theories when they can't make ends meet, when they can't put dinner on the table. They just want a damn job.

And you haven't done a damn thing to help those people.

As a matter of fact, you haven't even offered them a way to communicate with you.

Weeks Without the XBox 360 - It's Okay!

So you heard me whine about my XBox360 tweaking out all E74 on me and you're concerned, wondering whatever dear Ricky will do!?

I know. Worst bit? Mrs. Shambles leaves for parts abroad for 10 days on Friday, multiplying my video game play time by like 20. And my Xbox, sans faceplate and hard drive, awaits departure sometime tomorrow.

But it's not all loss and pain. In fact, it opens a happy and broad opportunity of getting back to some sense of roots. I'm not a deprived mess in any sense. I've still a working PS2 and Wii. And a bit of a backlog to go along with it.

Wii Weekend

For example, I have a couple Wii items I have to catch up on:

• I recently downloaded Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and have yet to crack into that
• I played most of Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess drunk and my last save was in the mer-people's land and I don't remember much about ...anything. Let's just say a start-over would be good.
• I recently had a birthday and just spent my xmas and bday gift cards to purchase (today) Metroid 3: Corruption and Super Mario Galaxy (+ hottest GameStop staff in recent memory)
• And if all else fails, I just found out LostWinds: Winter of the Melodias was released for download late last year.
• And I never did get very far into Super Mario 64

PS2 for One

Playstation2 still has some life in it as well:

• I still have GTA: San Andreas and in my latest save only have 1/3 of total gang territory left to conquer to own the whole town. Have not unlocked the 2 other sections of the map yet.
• Finally picked up God of War II at the aforementioned GameStop trip. Delicious.
• And there's always The Legend of Spyro: A New Beginning. Seriously, back off. It's a reboot of the series and the cast includes Elijah Wood as Spyro, David Spade as Sparx, Gary Oldman as Ignitus, and Cree Summer as Cynder. That's right: Gary fucking Oldman.

So that's pretty much my next 12 days, aside from work, that is. In case you were wondering. I will not continue to bitch about how Microsoft is fucking their fan base, except when new glitches appear in the process of getting my XBox fixed, which I have faith they will.

My Personal Red Ring: Xbox 360 - Error 74

This is the end
Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I'll never look into your eyes...again
Can you picture what will be
So limitless and free
Desperately in need...of some...stranger's hand
In a...desperate land
Lost in a Roman...wilderness of pain
And all the children are insane
All the children are insane

I was playing Fallout3 (see my Dogmeat rantamble here), and after clearing out a cave of Raiders and getting to looting the place and taking a nap, everything went Matrix on me, but red, and with lots of dots instead of the green characters. Ghosts of the action before me still remained, but none nearly visible enough to continue. Woah! I reset.

Then the flashing red light you see above. But hey, at least it's not the Red Ring of Death! Right? Wrong. MS places it straight:

While the majority of Xbox 360 owners continue to have a great experience with their console, we are aware that a very small percentage of our customers have reported receiving an error that displays “E74” on their screen. After investigating the issue, we have determined that the E74 error message can indicate the general hardware failure that is associated with three flashing red lights error on the console.

So my error and my "Oh, at least it's not the ring!" are all for nothing. And by "majority" they apparently mean "more than 50%." My research shows Microsoft is busting out repairs on an extended 3 year warranty for a possible 30% of customers who purchased an Xbox 360.

So you give me a free shipping label to fix a problem you KNEW about when I bought your system? P'sha!

I'd like 5000 points to go with the fact that I have to ship my system to you to get fixed, leaving me without the product I purchased.

Microsoft, you are a douche. And you're short-selling your clientelle. And you need to make amends. Even now, when the fervor of the red ring has died down, it still lives. It lives in every box that has been purchased. Even though you put out your statement in 2007 that you made changes, you're still sucking something hard because obviously the purchase I made a year ago was not iron-clad to your supposed changes.

This is bad business. I'll post it on my other blog too.

And I'll send in my Box with box and packing that I must pay for. And I'll call customer service every single day to find out when I'm getting it back and what credits I might expect.

I'll report back.

And my daughter just bought me Dead Rising. And even if I could play it, I just found out I can't read any of the text in the game: was optimized for HD.

Asshats. I'll let you know.

In Short: McDonald's FAIL

I stopped into McDonald's tonight. While in the drive-thru pay window, I noticed a sign posted inside:

Due to slow sales, hours have been cut for all employees. When sales increase, you will be given your hours back.

And when I was driving away, I noticed a sign posted in the front window:

HELP WANTED


FAIL


Your thoughts?

I Have Seen Hell. It is a Cube.

As many of you know, in the real world I am a web designer/expert running my own business. And since business is not exactly eating up my time and aiding in the paying of the bills, I spent today interviewing for what looks to be a "real" job. I haven't worked in an office proper for about 2 1/2 years.

The interview itself was fine; I didn't know all the techy answers, but no one ever does. I seem to have wowed them with my knowledge and ability to elucidate my experience and skills.

And then it turned weird. I took the tour.



We walked through a very large facility of over 400 employees. It would be the largest company I ever worked for. Cubes everywhere. Cube-y's Cube-y's everywhere, but not a thought to think. I just kept spouting um-hmmm's and okay's as we walked through and more cubes and more cubes with signs above them and every job I've had since college flashed through my mind. Small cube farms, large cube farms, policy binders on shelves, the guy with all his personal crap in his cube, sanctimonious bosses spouting bullshit teamwork rhetoric, team playing, posters of SUCCESS and clever phrases and the HR tourguide lady occasionally glanced at me with a micro emotion of a sneer, behind the look was the true face of a demon and I was getting a tour of my hell.

I was sweating, my stomach sinking, my breathing quickening, and I felt like I was on acid, speeding towards the edge of a panic attack. I kept it together through the rest of it but breathed like I hadn't in a week as soon as I walked out the door. But it lingered - as dusk fell and I drove home, I recalled the temperature and the dimming light and the driving as past lives and jobs and the commute home and the knot in my stomach would not disappear but even tightened and floated around this surreal world that was the second half of my day. I was so wrapped in emotion and fear-control that I got on the highway the wrong way and didn't realize it for 10 miles. It is truly only now, only after a couple beers, that I'm starting to seriously calm.

And writing this helps.

Worst thing is: if I'm offered the position, I really have to take it. Financially, I don't have much choice. Good news is I have a week until they decide and 10 days after that to drum up as much business as possible.

I have never been more motivated in my life.

Positive thoughts and prayers welcome. I'm running the Tommy Boy stretch from here on out.

I have seen hell. It is a cube. A whole series of cubes. With managers' offices along the walls and a common kitchen area with a microwave and fridge. I only pray I need never return but as a visitor.

A Practical Video on Why We Need Not-for-Profit Health Care

Shamelessly stolen from Liberality who shamelessly stole it from Walled-In Pond. I suggest Republicans take a careful look at a logical explanation and reevaluate their ignorance gap.

Verizon Sponsors Coal Teat Event

Check this out from the folks over at Think Progress:

On Labor Day, tens of thousands of people will be gathering for the coal-powered “Friends of America Rally” in Holden, WV. The point of the gathering is to rail against the Waxman-Markey clean energy legislation. It will feature right-wing guests such as Sean Hannity and Ted Nugent (who once ranted about killing Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton), and is being pushed by mountaintop-removal mining company Massey Energy. Last week, Massey CEO Don Blankenship even recorded a video inviting people to attend the rally, saying they would learn about how “environmental extremists and corporate America are both trying to destroy your jobs.”

Click that link above and follow it to the action link. This is bullshit. If you use Verizon, make certain you do something. Your money is your voice in this case.

The Green movement has NOTHING to do with employees of the coal industry losing their jobs, nor is it a current threat. The single largest reason why people in the coal industry lose their jobs is the greed and increasing efficiency of the coal companies themselves. To avoid backlash they blame it on the environmental movement and ignorance reigns, especially if you're CEO of Verizon and apparently suckling at the money teat of the coal industry.

TheyTookArrrJubbs!

Smokers Should Go Fuck Themselves

[I am a smoker - run through a pack in about a week, in a night if I'm drinking heavily.]

Humana, here in Cincinnati and elsewhere, is saying NO to hiring smokers.

Obviously, over the course of time, some smokers take advantage of their smoke breaks, some smokers rack up sick days and some of those days have to do with smoking.

But as the comments - and my own opinion - suggest, people who are overweight log more sick days too. I guess we need to not hire fat people. And people with kids use their sick days to stay home with their kids when their two-working-parent home would otherwise be vacated. We should probably not hire people with kids either.

I understand the logic, but am terrified at the slippery slope we are working at.

How do we resolve these ideas? How do I resolve them in my own head?

Fucking Adsense

So with all those fancy numbers I spouted last week, I was inspired to make a little coin off the 100+ daily visitors. I signed up for Adsense. Being a web developer, I've done this for a couple clients, but never really for myself.

For those that don't know, you can apply for an Adsense account, get some code to put on your blog, and ads show up on the right and when someone clicks them you get a couple pennies.

Got the official "Welcome to Adsense" email this morning, set up a couple sample ad accounts, added them to a widget on this site and...

Security Error: Content at http://googleads.g.doubleclick.net/ may not load data from...

The Google Ads will not display on my blog at all.

First thought it was a Doubleclick issue, an acquisition of Google's that has been pegged in the past for malicious ads that want to put their naughty parts in your computer's secret places. And after further research I think I figured out that it's not that, but Google's terms of enlightenment that have pegged me. From everything I can gather, I swear too much.

To that I say:

....................../´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\...


Stop Starbucks ...?

I got an email today from Brave New Films, a great group known for bringing some of the evils of Walmart into the light for everyone to see. They sent me a link to the following video and a website to Stop Starbucks:



The shitstamp on the forehead of Starbucks, according to this video and its sources, is that Starbucks is engaging in union-busting activities. Okay, bad on them. That should stop.

But Brave New Films goes a few steps too far in demonizing Starbucks as something equivalent to Walmart. And they're not. And that's not fair if we're going to be claiming to stand upon principles based on all the facts.

How about the differences between Starbucks and Walmart?

• Starbucks has always paid well over minimum wage and offers benefits to part-time workers as well as quick advancement to dedicated employees.
• Walmart trims corners everywhere, refusing to pay anywhere close to a living wage, seldom offering benefits, has issues with equal pay and advancement for women.


• Starbucks gets involved in local, community projects to improve the neighborhood in which they're located.
• Walmart creates acres of parking lots, local traffic problems, and barely-scraping-by poor.


• Starbucks has engaged the Free Trade program, making sure the coffee growers are getting a fair cut for the product they supply.
• Walmart is known for strong-arming their suppliers into shifting their manufacturing to China, killing thousands of manufacturing jobs and exploiting millions of Chinese men, women, and children.

If we're going to complain about something - and something that by all counts needs to be exposed - then do it fairly and without the sensationalism. Otherwise we're filling our pleas with as much bullshit as the Right Wing anytime they raise an issue. And then who would believe our causes?

Wake-Up Walmart: Workers Still Fighting for Change

Even though Obama took the helm, there are still huge problems in the heartland.

Check the video. Do something.

ShamWow: You'll Say "Hooker, Gimmie My Fucking Tongue Back" Every Time

The Smoking Gun is my hero today.

You know Vince from ShamWow, right? How about a refresher on the mug:



Wait! Holy asshats, Vince? Why do you look so disheveled?

Turns out that Vince picked up this girl:



Wait! Why does she look like that?

Can I tell the fucking story? Cause ya know we can't do this all day.

Vince was propositioned by the girl above, took her back to his hotel, gave her $1000, and apparently at first kiss, she clamped down on his tongue which prompted him to struggle and then repeatedly beat her about the face and head at which point she finally let go. Vince ran down to the lobby, bleeding, cops got involved, and they were both stitched and booked. Not surprisingly, it appears they were both drunk.

Ah, Vince, 15 minutes can be so short. Ya won't find Billy Mays whoring it up like that.

Pickle Pringles

I was going to rant about a crappy experience I had today, but found in my searches that it had already had been done for me.

Check out this post on the Pringles Extreme Screamin’ Dill Pickle.

If you like pickles, if you like Pringles, it just plain sucks. Done. No more than that. I feel so betrayed. I need to take a shower.

UPDATE: No, after a shower, the tennis ball tube in my pantry still haunts me. $2? WTF? I don't even think the pigeons would eat it. I don't even think I have pigeons!

Ah, painful pickle spice, three Pringles down, what to do with the leftover pain?

Annual Turkey Cruelty

This is undercover footage of an enormous turkey breeding operation in West Virginia, Avigen. Their website says "The spirit of innovation lives on." And by innovation they mean stomping on turkey heads and slamming them into other objects to kill them.

No boobs or swearing or human suffering, so I guess it's safe for work. Not safe for your mental health or Thanksgiving plans.



I had to turn it off after about a minute.

Baghdad Disneyland? WTF?

Over at Think Progress, they have a FOX News interview with the contractor tasked with and American-style amusement park. In Baghdad. I can't embed it, but check the link; it's worth it.

They talk about the issues plaguing building an amusement park in Iraq like it's just going up in an economically depressed area. Except it's a war zone. And they're planning it outside the Green Zone, apparently being "fast-tracked" by the Pentagon.

Come to The Baghdad Zoo and Entertainment Experience: Bullets, IEDs, mortars, broken rides, and dead animals! Hopefully your family won't be taken for ransom. But that's part of the Experience!

This is not just the definitive example of lipstick on a pig, but lipstick on a mad, violent boar. We'd be better served to build a "Iraq War Experience" park where the military embeds regular citizens into the war. They'd probably pay more.

What the hell are we thinking?

All Business, Good & Bad

Just a reminder that my other blog, All Business, Good & Bad, is starting to pick up, as far as me posting more often goes.

The original premise of the blog (it was originally "Bad Business") was to provide a platform for me - as well as any other folks who wanted to email their stories - to piss and moan about consumer failures in the marketplace. I've since expanded it to include good business experiences because, well, simply pissing and moaning gets a little tired after a while. Not to mention that I've had some seriously wonderful experiences since moving to Cincinnati, OH.

There are national companies as I deal with them in chains or on the web, and there is some local Cincinnati flavor that can give you, fair reader, a heads-up on what to expect and possibly avoid from your own local service providers.

Posts past and including even today: Crappy Adidas shoes, the plus and minus of Proactiv, airline debacles, and home warranty companies. Much more in the archives. Much more to come (and I promise: more positive!).

Enjoy.

Debbie Shank Vindicated, But Our Job Is Not Done

From the good folks at WakeUpWalMart.com:

Over the past few weeks, the Debbie Shank case gave us a tremendous opportunity to teach Wal-Mart a lesson about corporate responsibility.

Check out the Wal-Mart workers' petition to Lee Scott and Shank case overview

Today, the backlash against Wal-Mart's lawsuit finally drove the company to drop its claim on her settlement winnings. Consider this concrete proof that Wal-Mart must change when supporters like you take action.

After years of being dragged through the courts, the Shanks can finally begin to piece their lives back together. We couldn't be happier for Debbie and her family. But, we still can't forget the other Wal-Mart associates who have been treated unfairly by Wal-Mart.

Let's not forget Olga Sanchez, who lost her job because Wal-Mart wouldn't let her see her son before he was deployed to Iraq; or Sean Thornton, who lost his job while he was on active duty. We can't let Wal-Mart forget the 1.6 million women involved in the largest certified gender discrimination lawsuit in history.

We can change America's largest retailer just by raising our voices. That's an amazing thing. If we all remember this day, we'll see better things to come for Wal-Mart's associates.

Do not forget that Wal-Mart intakes 20% of China's GDP, that 80% of its products are from China (no workers' rights, lead, and all), and that it strongarms American companies to produce in China, manipulating the free market and killing American jobs. Oh, and don't forget the assassination of local businesses.

Our job, our duty, is far from over.

Debbie Shank: Yes, Wal-Mart is the Villain

I love getting comments for my posts; it's like getting a present in the mail every time my email tells me that I got a comment. And for the most part, I simply reply (because I pretty much reply to all comments).

However, this one stuck with me on the issue of Debbie Shank and Wal-Mart:

Why is Wal-mart the villian? Three months after their employee enrolled in the health insurance they provide a semi-truck hits her and when she recovers a million $ they ask to be repaid their expenses. Ms Shank's accident is unfortunate but not Wal-marts fault. I haven't read anywhere if she recovered funds from her auto insurance...only that she can no longer afford a full time nurse and may have to move to a semi-private room.

My Response:

anonymous-

Wal-Mart provided health care. That health care provided Debbie Shank with the care she needed to recover to the point that she was before the settlement.

The settlement - which, because of costs, she got less than half of - was a court's decision that she needed/deserved that money to maintain proper care of her because of the injuries she incurred.

Wal-Mart, because of their insurance small-print, was well within their rights to recoup expenses. But there is business and there is good business; there is small print and there is over-reaching past morality and humanity to make a buck. Corporation, business, or human: this is wrong.

For fucking Christ's Sake! The woman can't remember her son died in Iraq from day to day and weeps like it's the first time every time. Throw her a fucking bone by not raping her for the money that might take care of her that she won't even realize anyway! "Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol? "

Wal-Mart will always be the villain because of how they strongarm producers to produce overseas (see: China) to increase their profit margin and kill American jobs in order to give us lower prices and lower standard-of-living jobs.

20% of China's product goes to Wal-Mart. 80% of what Wal-Mart purchases is from China, lead paint and all. Wal-Mart is the villain because it is hurting America and Americans. Nothing less.

Know What I Love About Wal-Mart?

12-year-old Chinese children working 15 hour days, 7 days a week, at $0.26 an hour to make Christmas ornaments for the Big-Box Monster. That's the holiday spirit!

From Mother Jones:

With the help of the National Labor Committee—the American outfit famed for shaming Kathy Lee Gifford for her line's exploitative labor practices—the teenagers have brought to light yet another scandal with big implications. Turns out the Guangzhou Huanya ornaments factory in Guangdong, where the high school students worked, employs children as young as 12, who are forced to work 15 hour days, 7 days a week to make Wal-Mart's Christmas ornaments in time for the holiday season. It might come as no surprise that the wages paid by the big box behemoth's manufacturers are paltry, but these kids earn only half of China's minimum wage—just 26 cents an hour.

Anyone else just want to throw up? If you haven't figured it out yet: It doesn't matter how good the deals are; stop shopping at Wal-Mart. If words won't do it for that shopping itch, the whistle-blowing teens were able to get some pictures:



What is anyone still doing shopping there?