Ricky's Wisdom for Today - 2/2/08

This is not for every day, but can be applied to many. Today is one of those days.

L'enfer, c'est les autres.
(Hell is other people.)

-- Jean-Paul Sartre, Huis-clos (No Exit)

Crippling the Middle East Through Technology

I know there are many people out there that have the absurd conviction that everyone in the Middle East lives in dusty ruins without electricity, but that is simply not the case; major centers of industry and technology exist in Egypt, Dubai, Iran, etc. A little further east and you probably have personal experience to back up India's call center megapoli.

Now what would happen if two undersea cables near Egypt were suddenly cut? Perhaps by a "wayward anchor?" Well, that's odd, you might say. Or should say since it happened Wednesday.

And then on Friday, a third cable was "damaged" between United Arab Emirates and Oman. Oops! What're the odds?

Now, what would you say if said "accidents" not only damaged access to the internet for all the countries listed above, but resulted in Iran having NO access?

I'd probably call that Holy Shit What's Going Down?

There are thinly-veiled "OMG 4th Cable!" stories floating on the bullshit foam of the internet ether, all of them unfounded. For now. I've also seen some reports, none verifiable, that Iran's access is being remedied, but is being done through American and British servers.

Something hinky is going on here.

Michael Savage: Old Man Hates teh Gay

During the tragic death of Heath Ledger, most of you have heard of John Gibson, lead reptilian humanoid of FOX News using Ledger's death as a way to make a stupid, sad joke about him as a "weirdo" "with a drug problem." Why? Because John Gibson is a bigot and hates gays and Heath Ledger once made a movie that made a lot of money about a man struggling with his sexuality in an oppressive society.

But John Gibson is an assbag; he got plenty of negative press for the comments, made that ever-traditional "I'm sorry if people were offended" non-apology, and I still think he's an assbag and assbags all over the country still think he's a credible journalist. Status quo.

But what we haven't heard of, what I can't seem to find any reference about, is Michael Savage's treatment of the same subject. We've already visited how Dr. Savage pounced on Muslims, but unless you regularly listen to his verbal and often-unfocused hate ooze through your speakers, you may not know that he's a dirty old codger, living in San Francisco, and daily railing against the filth and amorality of homosexuals destroying the city.

Last Tuesday, January 22nd, as speculation over Heath Ledger's death was haphazardly spilling over the airwaves, Michael Savage had some choice words:

This is the biggest story of the day: Shock in SoHo? Actor Heath Ledger, pills, suicide? You mean another Hollywood junkie is dead? I'm sorry, you mean that's news? News used to be "Man Bites Dog," but when another Hollywood idiot is found with a needle in his arm, is that news? I mean, you expect it, when they don't put a needle in their arm, that would be news.
...
So, what, he played in Brokenback Mountain, Bareback Mountain, whatever he was in, I forget what movie he was in. I never watched it - I'm not interested in softcore pornography, to be honest with you.
...
When I first heard Gene Autry, even though I was stuck inside the knish, I knew that there was a place outside the knish, where there was beautiful skies and bison and men who rode horses, as opposed to ersatz men who rode horses who played homosexuals who rolled in the hay together who then eventually stuck needles in their arm because they know that they had destroyed one of the true images of America in order to make a buck and they couldn't take the fact that they had sold down the river the image of the great America itself.

And that's just the Heath Ledger bit. The spew of homosexual hate and "agenda" conspiracy theories can be found elsewhere. But if John Gibson caught hell, where's the outrage about Savage?


"He's just a mean old man without a mommy!"

Did I mention his penchant for inappropriate characterizations?


Yes, this is a screenshot from his site.

Outrage would be good right about now.

Croatian Smurfs get Smurfed

What's more fun than spending your afternoon in Croatia trying to break the Guinness Book of World Records record for the largest gathering of Smurfs?



Smurfing at them from America because someone didn't do their research.

When they contacted World Guiness Book of Records to register their feat they were told they were too late.

Even though they had managed to gather 395 Smurf-a-likes in one place, this Croatian attempt to smash the record turned out to be a waste of time.

Shoddy research meant they believed they only had to get 291 'Smurfs' in one place to clinch the prized record.

However they managed to overlook one vitally important fact.

A new record had actually been set by students at Warwick University last year where they had managed to round up a grand total of 451 Smurfs.

How could this have happened? They did their research "on the internet." Ooh, beware ye research on the internet, fair Croats. Lest you spend your afternoon with a blue face for absolutely no reason at all.

I wonder if they served blue beer.

Obama and the Decriminalization of Marijuana

From the Washington Post:

But as a candidate for the U.S. Senate four years ago, Mr. Obama told Illinois college students that he supported eliminating criminal penalties for marijuana use or possession, according to a videotape of a little noticed debate that was obtained by The Washington Times.

"I think we need to rethink and decriminalize our marijuana laws," Mr. Obama told an audience during a debate at Northwestern University in 2004. "But I'm not somebody who believes in legalization of marijuana." (Play video below.)


Asked about the two different answers, Mr. Obama's presidential campaign said he in fact has "always" supported decriminalizing marijuana as he answered in 2004, meaning the candidate mistakenly raised his hand during the presidential debate last fall.

I don't smoke any more, but Obama and Clinton are so similar in so many different ways, this distinction - if verified by Obama - is an important one that highlights his dedication to progressive ideals.

I don't vote until March 4th, but every piece of information matters, and I'm looking eagerly towards the Democratic Debate this evening.

Notes on the State of the Union Address

A day late, but this is primarily pure outrage; if someone paid me a great deal of money (and by that, I mean like $1000) back in January of 2007 to concoct the most outrageous, ignorant speech - going with naive, not snarky - containing a bizarro-world amalgamation of exactly how not to run America, how not to take Americans' best interests into account, with the very distinct focus of simply pissing myself off, I could not have come up with the disastrous anger-fest that was George Bush's final State of the Union Address. I'm glad I put my daughter to bed before this yearly session of Congressional Calisthenics began because I have not shouted such foul language at the television with such frequency and vigor in a very long time.

Short short version: President Bush either has not a single damned clue as to what is happening in America and the world at large or is purposefully deluding himself and the 15% of Americans who actually believe anything that comes out of his mouth.

And now, more snark, now with more bullets!

• President Bush apparently did not get the memo about his tie: during an election year, blue = democrats.


• Nancy Pelosi showed up in a lovely washed-out mauve, was seen soon after either making fun of stroke patients or chewing the inside of her lips, and later was seen completely enveloped in what I'm guessing was a copy of the speech or a seating chart, but was entertained as a copy of the Constitution, the Official SotU Program, or the drink menu for the afterparty.


• The IRS "accepts both checks and money orders," i.e., fuck you, America, wish in one hand, shit in the other and all that, heh, heh, heh.


• Americans should have to balance a budget, the government should too. Is that before or after the creative accounting that doesn't really count the asshorde of money being shipped - sometimes in cash - over to Iraq on a daily basis?


• We need to "trust Americans" with home ownership. Actually, G, it's the trusting of Americans with ownership and letting banks run rampant over them that caused the current crisis. Tried it and it didn't work, but he wants to dump money into Ginnie Mae and Freddie Mac to exacerbate the issue just after he raised the rate for Sallie Mae loans for college that might actually result in personal betterment. But then the populace wouldn't be under the thumb of stress that they need to be in order to be properly complacent.


• "Epidemic of junk medical lawsuits." It's not an epidemic, but a perfect example of the language of people being puppeteered by Big Insurance. They've got him too! Damn you special interests!


• No Child Left Behind: "trust children to learn" and "no one can deny the results." In a way, he's right: NCLB is an unmitigated disaster, hands down; it has resulted in dumber kids who know only how to fill in bubbles - not to think - and will have less success in college because of it. You couldn't build a more dependent underclass with the faux air of betterment if you planned it that way. But maybe only Cheney knows those ropes.


• "Pell grants for kids." Stop trying to put more money in the hands of religious organizations and let's work on making K - 12 institutions of thinking and college affordable.


• "Reducing our dependence on oil." Since when? The last time he said that, it was "clarified" by complete revocation after the Saudis shouted "shenanigans." Then again, he probably primed them on his recent trip: "Hey, so I'm gonna say that oil independence bullshit again, but you gotta be all hush-hush about it, k? Not so damn loud; we've got an understanding. Hey, look at that goat humpin' that other goat, heh heh."


• "Reverse the growth of greenhouse gasses" and "combating global climate change." Unfortunately, the only thing Bush has done in the last 7 years is reverse the growth of science and combating any reports that said global warming was a reality.


• "Al Qaeda is on the run in Iraq and this enemy will be defeated." Is this a rerun? I thought this was live.


• Don't dare bring up Israel and Palestine now. You haven't given a shit in the last 7 years and this feigning sympathy is making you look like an asshat.


• "America opposes genocide in Sudan." We're just not going to do a damn thing to stop it. Ever.


• Bush dictionary: "Zimbowey" - some place in Africa where black people dance in the dirt.

This was sickening to watch and angering to listen to. The best pundit response, admittedly, came from Chris Matthews in post, who said it was like that last minute New Year's resolutions you never got around to, like "I'm gonna learn French this year."

No initiative he spoke of means anything, nor does the appearance of suddenly caring - after seven years - fool anyone into a false sense of "hey, yeah, I think he's got his shit together. I think we'll be okay until next year." We are in free fall and only the man behind the podium thinks he's sitting on the beach.

Giuliani Pulls Out, Impregnates McCain

Happy Birthday to me, and over 2 weeks early! That's right, Rudy Giuliani, the wooden-toothed professional crooner of 9/11 and all-round smug failure is prepared to pull out of the presidential race this very morning before the last Republican debate before Super Bowl Sunday and Super Tuesday. I think that somehow makes today the Ascension of Mary and places Mardi Gras firmly on the biggest primary day of the year, guaranteeing a slight booze shift to the polls and complete confusion amongst the pundits. Again. But I digress.

What could possibly make this better? Irony, of course! Rudy Giuliani will be making this announcement from the Reagan Library (where the debate will later take place), the living symbol of the dry-hump chew toy darling of the Republican Party, in order to endorse Grandpappy McCain, the only Republican running for president who - according to pundits and the talk radio faction and many Repubs - is not a Reagan Republican. Ooh, snap!

But why McCain? I can't wait for Rudy's blah-blah explanation but would like to take a pass on hearing Chris Matthews spout "Maverick" yet again. John McCain is not Tom Cruise or James Garner or Mel Gibson; it's John McCain, not John McClane, Chrissy. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!

McCain's playing the game, and he's playing it well, despite his detractors on flip-flopping, inconsistency, and age. He's got Giuliani's support now and there are hints that he's going to help fluff Huckabee through Super Tuesday to keep the votes away from Romney and cinch up the nomination like his momma's corset. Can we smell a McCain Huckabee ticket? Someone light some incense; I think I'm gonna be sick.

Human Rights Campaign: Resolve

It took them quite a long time to get back to me with the embed code, but this video on human rights in America is still very relevant. From the Human Rights Campaign:

Ricky's Wisdom Today

Well, it's not particularly my wisdom per se, but wisdom that resonates with me on some level. Since the world is constantly changing and reality is always a subjective experience, it's just the wisdom "today," though feel free to hold on until something better comes along. And since it's the first installment, you get some bonus Wisdom action, because how can I introduce something new without the very roots and favorites of that something?

Now that's wise.

Today I ran into this quote and it just felt right: focused, yet sad.

Going along in company together, a wise man
Must mix with other foolish persons.
But on seeing what is wrongful he abandons them.
As a full-fledged heron leaves the marshy ground.

-Udana 8.7

Bonus? Of course. These are perhaps my most cherished quotes when it comes to my personal ideas about wisdom:

One who speaks does not know
One who knows does not speak

-- Lao Tzu - Tao Te Ching - Verse 56

I know I am God because when I pray to Him I find I am speaking to Myself.

--Peter Barnes

Put dat in your book.

Gang Bang Jesus

"I did it like this. I did it like that. I did it with a wiffle ball bat."

I was doing a search this afternoon on de money gang bang for a single reference in a little post over at ATD.

On the first page of image results, I saw this:



So my question to you is: Is Jesus helping a kid play baseball more absurd than finding the image while searching for de money gang bang, or do they combine in a sociological, post-modern mental clusterfuck that cannot truly be comprehended by our human brains without an advanced degree in philosophy and a bottle of Jameson?