Saturday, May 02, 2009

Cum and Cat Piss II: Spring in Bloom!

Last year I posted about how the Bradford Pear tree blooms smell like cum. You know it when you smell it.

But last year at this time I was wowed by the lack of understanding and comments and information I could get on why I keep smelling stale cat pee. And now it's back. But I dug deep, sniffed hundreds of plants, and have an answer.

What's my deal? Juniper. It sometimes grows high and narrow, sometimes low and wide; it's everywhere (although I think somehow specific to a specie in Cincinnati/Southern Ohio/Northern Kentucky). Apparently just bugs me. Smells like cat pee. Stale cat pee. It's wafting in my window right now.

Anyone else smelled this way?

Friday, May 01, 2009

Conservatives: This is Why You Can't Have Anything Nice

Severin is a racist douchebag

Hey, guess what?
Jay Severin, the fiery right wing talk show host on Boston's WTKK-FM radio station, was suspended yesterday after calling Mexican immigrants "criminaliens," "primitives," "leeches," and exporters of "women with mustaches and VD," among other incendiary comments.
I guess he missed "lazy." Oh, sorry, that's black people. (that was a joke, folks)

It is people like this - and the fact that they keep showing up (or cracking their shimmery outer crust) - that detracts from ANY argument that minorities should be on the side of conservatives or Republicans.

And who says shit like that except raging, seething racists? Oh, and while I realize conservatives read this blog, please refrain from telling me "he's just racist against Mexicans." I've heard that argument before and it's a complete retardation of thought, like saying "That guy's just a pedophile for blondes." (No, I am not calling Severin a pedophile.)

Very high-end Republicans with NO record of bigotry need to stand up and repudiate stuff like this. Although the former end of the last sentence may leave a VERY small pool. Ah, well. Good on us liberals then.
UPDATE: Rep. Steve King calls Black and Hispanic Congressional Caucuses "separatist groups" and House Minority Leader John Boehner (R-OH) released a fearmongering video juxtaposing Chavez and the Congressional Hispanic Caucus.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Gary Oldman Goes Full Dwarf

Thank you to my friend, Mr Terrific, for alerting me to this video. And FilmDrunk for more information on it.

Shows I'm Currently / Recurringly Watching

For no apparent reason and in no apparent order, these are the shows I currently watch on the teevee. Yes, I watch too much teevee.

The Amazing Race
CSI: Miami
The Mighty Boosh
Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job!
Robot Chicken
The Sarah Connor Chronicles
The Mentalist

That is all.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Mighty Boosh - Vince Meets the Crack Fox

I've been catching Mighty Boosh's 3rd season on Adult Swim, and when I saw this bit last week, I just about peed myself. Squishy Boots.


The Green Pizza Box of the Future!

No, this is not a "did you order sausage with that?" video. Nor is it a box for green pizza. Contain your disappointment.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Not Exactly "Just" In...

Caught this on the teevee a few minutes ago and because MSNBC doesn't have a live online feed, took a picture.


The first problem is with the verb agreement: "Centers for Disease Control Holds" does not fly with me. Centers hold; centers do no holds. "for Disease Control" is a prepositional phrase. CDC holds. "Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.."

The Gestalt of the language is also problematic. "This Just In" connotes news that has just popped up. "Centers for Disease Control Holds Press Conference on Swine Flu Outbreak" did not just pop up. A press conference is an ongoing event; just in means a punctuation. If you had news that they were "going to" hold a press conference, that would be just in. But by the time the CDC guy at the podium starts speaking, you must alter your "Just In" subtext to the contents of the news he is delivering as the press conference is already going on.

Just a thought.

Swine Flu: Ohio Represent!

Ohio swine flu map

That's right, motherfuckers! Oink! Oink! Ohio's in the mix. One of only 6 states to be visited by the piggy sickness.

I know you're jealous.

Prop 8 - The Musical

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Hey, Homeland Security: What the Fuck?

Perhaps you've heard of the recent release by United States Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano of a brief entitled "Rightwing Extremism: Current Economic and Political Climate Fueling Resurgence in Radicalization and Recruitment." (click here for the PDF)

Awwwshiit. What did we just do?

Now, wait a second. You may have heard the calls of the right wing radio nutters that this is classifying veterans and pro-lifers and end times bible prophecy goons as terrorists. Well, not entirely, but...yeah. It is. To be clear, the document (and I suggest you read it. Now.) defines "rightwing terrorists/extremists" as primarily hate groups and in a kickback to the 90's reminds us of Oklahoma City and (indirectly) of Waco with a nod to today's economy and a black president.
How about some excerpts just as a sampling?
The possible passage of new restrictions on firearms and the return of military veterans facing significant challenges reintegrating into their communities could lead to the potential emergence of terrorist groups or lone wolf extremists capable of carrying out violent attacks.
The high volume of purchases and stockpiling of weapons and ammunition by rightwing extremists in anticipation of restrictions and bans in some parts of the country continue to be a primary concern to law enforcement.
Prominent among these themes were the militia movement’s opposition to gun control efforts, criticism of free trade agreements (particularly those with Mexico), and highlighting perceived government infringement on civil liberties as well as white supremacists’ longstanding exploitation of social issues such as abortion, inter-racial crimes, and same-sex marriage.
Antigovernment conspiracy theories and “end times” prophecies could motivate extremist individuals and groups to stockpile food, ammunition, and weapons. These teachings also have been linked with the radicalization of domestic extremist individuals and groups in the past, such as violent Christian Identity organizations and extremist members of the militia movement.

Okay, that's about enough.

When Bush was president, did the administration monitor "people of interest" that included just about every person who had something bad to say about the president (hey NSA guys!)? Yes. Were they dumb enough to put it all down in a document so the fucking world could jump down their throats? No. Granted, they had Patriotism on their side, so all they had to do to activate their myrmidons was issue a press release saying "Hey, if anyone - your neighbor, cousin, or mother - is doing something suspicious, it's your Patriotic Duty to report the potential threat."

My thoughts? I know; that's what you're here for.

I think Napolitano and Biden wrote this thing on 48 hours and 6 gallons of 40 proof Kamchatka Vodka and she released it on a hangover.

From an organizational perspective (coming from a degree in Writing), this is a hack job. The organization sucks, flow is non-existent, repetition is rampant, and implications/non-implications/this-is-what-we-really-meant would confuse the bejezus out of anyone.

From a political perspective, it's a bomb. It wasn't right for Bush to turn half+ of America into potential terrorists and it's not right for Obama's administration to do the same thing. It's terrifying and it's wrong. Granted, I personally believe that people that stockpile food and guns because they think Jesus is coming back to turn our Black president White are a bunch of fucking nutters. But - first off - it's their right to believe that and act on any impulse that does not harm others. Secondly, the language used here is a conversation you have in a bar when you're sure you're amongst liberal friends, not something you put to paper (or PDF in HUGE font) and release as official government policy.

I think Napolitano needs to retract the document and resign. This is a bullshit move by an administration that was running on No Bullshit, a Bushesque move by an administration promising to be different. Demonizing ...any American citizen at this point is a betrayal of that.