Nostalgia: Atari 2600 - The Fun is Back

Under fifty bucks? Now isn't that nice?

Quickie on Health Care

I heard some Republican choad this morning say that they would never enact a system that would place a bureaucrat between a person and their health care.

I say that (or technically a law facilitating care) is much better than what we have now: a shady insurance company who's sole, driving interest is to DENY you access to that care in order to maintain a substantial profit margin.

But I guess Republican lawmakers can't get kickbacks from a law.

Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Enemy Combatants?

So now Congress won't give Obama his $80 million to close Gitmo.

(Wait; why again does it cost $80 million to close Gitmo? As Ron Paul puts it: "A padlock costs about 10 bucks and buses are cheap.")

Well, where them terr'rists gonna live? I doan want no Osama bin Laden walkin' roun on my streets.

First off, they're not terrorists; they're enemy combatants. If we were being faithful to the Geneva Convention, they'd be called Prisoners of War. Second, they aren't being released into the wilds of Small Town America. They would go to one of our jails.

But them terr'rists could break out and come get me and my family cause they hate America cause of our freedoms.

There are about 2 million people in America's prision system at any given time. There are less than 250 detainees at Gitmo. Have you ever had an escaped convict enter your home and threaten your family?

Well, no, but they hate America cause they're terr'rists.

But I told you; they're not terrorists. Some of the people in America's prisons are actual terrorists. Like the Unabomber? Many of the other convicts are murders. They hate life. I saw a guy on Discovery the other day who was in prison at 15 and said it was his personal mission to kill as many people as he could before he died.

Aww, he's just a kid. But them terr'rists are tricky.

What about Montana? There's a prison up there that wants the terr- dang, detainees. Says it'll create over 100 jobs.

Yeah, but they'll break out and then it'll be terr'rists on our streets.

It snows a lot in Montana.

Hmmm...that might work. Snow is like poison lava to them arabs.

So we bring them?

Hell no. Osama'll kill my family. Obama- hehe. See what I did there?

Clever.

He's a Muslim, you know.

Lovely.

I really don't know exactly how to reason with anyone with an irrational fear that someone will break out of one of our prisons and specifically target them. They are retarded. Unfortunately, many of "them" are currently running the country. And a certain number will never vote yea on anything having to do with Gitmo unless it is a bill to pay for 250 bullets.

Let's just say I'm a little disappointed with the Democratic Party as a whole as of late.

For My Cleveland Friends

Having spent most of my life in Cleveland, I can post this with good humor:

Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video (h/t @akbiocity)

Juxtaposition

Travel up I-75 around Troy, MI, and you'll pass this exit, as I was fortunate enough to do a couple times in my life.



Exit 69: Big Beaver Road

This Week's Rape Van

It's Wednesday and you know what that means. Oh, no, I guess you don't because I'm trying something new. I'm going to stick to it; and I mean it. Anybody want a peanut?

Yesterday on Twitter I started a new hashtag #rapevan in a tweet about limitations on the awful things credit card companies do to us. IM discussion with my friend Brent (he's got something to link to now!) brought up the spectre of an actual rape van and hijacking the hashtag. He provided me with an image.

All that just to say: Here's your weekly rape van.



Filthy? check
Rusting? check
Limited windows? check
Airbrushed mural? check
Airbrushed mural contains dragon? check
Bumper held on by wire coming from brake light well? check

Actually, as I have apparently found Plato's Form of a rape van, I don't know that there is any reason to continue posting mere facsimiles. Perhaps I have defeated myself in another regular feature.

Let me know. Would you like to see a weekly image of an mural van that makes you cringe? Any examples you would like to submit? How about best submission gets a custom Rape Van Hunter badge?

[UPDATE: "Rape Van" has been tastefully changed to "Van Mural"]

Welcome New Friends

I spent some time today and made a lot of new friends.

And yes, I now need to take some time and update (and winnow) my Blogroll. Maybe I'll even enter everyone in that fancy widget that shows your last blog post too. Oh so hoity-toity. But I'll get to it, so quitcha bitchin'.

I just wanted to welcome you. Have a look around. Make some new friends yourself in my follow list. Most people enjoy the original photoshops. Have fun!

Andrew Wilkow Continues

Over a year ago, after listening to Andrew Wilkow a few times on Sirius, I created a post entitled Andrew Wilkow: My New Pain in the Ass.

If you haven't read it, it's interesting enough. Calling out right-wing douchebags usually is. The reason I mention it is that is has consistently been the largest draw to my blog and even after a year still getting comments (many are mine, but I'm up to 89). Enjoy!

I believe tomorrow I shall inform you about what else seems to draw people here. It's quite interesting and involves elf porn.

Stop Starbucks ...?

I got an email today from Brave New Films, a great group known for bringing some of the evils of Walmart into the light for everyone to see. They sent me a link to the following video and a website to Stop Starbucks:



The shitstamp on the forehead of Starbucks, according to this video and its sources, is that Starbucks is engaging in union-busting activities. Okay, bad on them. That should stop.

But Brave New Films goes a few steps too far in demonizing Starbucks as something equivalent to Walmart. And they're not. And that's not fair if we're going to be claiming to stand upon principles based on all the facts.

How about the differences between Starbucks and Walmart?

• Starbucks has always paid well over minimum wage and offers benefits to part-time workers as well as quick advancement to dedicated employees.
• Walmart trims corners everywhere, refusing to pay anywhere close to a living wage, seldom offering benefits, has issues with equal pay and advancement for women.


• Starbucks gets involved in local, community projects to improve the neighborhood in which they're located.
• Walmart creates acres of parking lots, local traffic problems, and barely-scraping-by poor.


• Starbucks has engaged the Free Trade program, making sure the coffee growers are getting a fair cut for the product they supply.
• Walmart is known for strong-arming their suppliers into shifting their manufacturing to China, killing thousands of manufacturing jobs and exploiting millions of Chinese men, women, and children.

If we're going to complain about something - and something that by all counts needs to be exposed - then do it fairly and without the sensationalism. Otherwise we're filling our pleas with as much bullshit as the Right Wing anytime they raise an issue. And then who would believe our causes?

Baman Piderman

(Baman Piderman 2 can be found here)

Have a great weekend!

No Time to Blog, Damnit!

I'd like to sit down and have a nice talk with your about politics or religion or the world or spirituality or why our president is being a pussy about some photos, but I can't right now because my sister's in town for my wife's college graduation. She's bored, Mrs. Shambles is making dinner with a sour eye in my direction because of my extended work day, and there's just not enough time. Or not enough me time.

So I'll be back on Friday. Tomorrow. And we'll talk then.

Have a great evening!

I Don't Know Nothin' Bout Trackin' No Monies

This is Rep. Alan Grayson asking the Federal Reserve Inspector General about trillions of dollars of YOUR money and whether anyone's keeping track of where the money is and whether or not there are losses in the lending. Her answers are not encouraging.



Duuhh...ummm...I don't know. This is why we can't have anything nice. This is why, even if Obama's efforts are 100% genuine and could 100% fix the mess we're in, it won't. Everyone jumps up and screams FIRE and they bring out the money shooter and only months later do they say "Hmm. Is someone keeping track of this?" Of course because everyone assumes that someone's got the oversight thing handled, no one's got the oversight handled.

One day, in a futuristic, Planet of the Apes scenario, when we're pounding the beach in front of a decaying Statue of Liberty, maybe then we'll get it.

Michael Savage and Sam from Today's Special

I just recently hit on this as a part of one post, but thought it needed a little more attention and therefore have created an account with icanhascheezburger.com and this image:



If you don't know about Michael Savage, you need to get out of the cave and listen to at least two shows at least until you have to vomit. If you don't know about Today's Special, I can give you this link and show you this clip of the intro:


(holy fucking box of shit, I haven't seen this in over 25 years and watching it was like an acid trip back to my parents' basement in '85)

But if you haven't seen it, the reference simply won't be as funny. If you have, then you may just have shit yourself.

The Ladies Love Obama

Some folks are seriously dedicated to President Obama. In fact, here are two from Cincinnati:



These two are so dedicated that one of them ran into someone's house to steal a picture of him. So dedicated that the getaway driver would bring her 3-year-old son on the burglary trip with them. So dedicated that they are now in jail.

The weirdest thing is that they sought to abscond with a picture. This isn't a rare 19th century Daguerreotype. It's a picture that, if digital or scanned, could be recreated for less than $1. Images in our society are ubiquitous.

Ah, but that's Cincinnati for you. :(

Thoughts For Sunday: Caffine, Energy, Mustard, and Bible Hate

Friday night I bought a 12 of Miller Lite. The caps have now gone gold and are being touted as flavor savers or some shit. I think we all know it just means Miller Lite has gone caffeine-free.


I believe a leaf blower is a horrible affront to our environment, wasting gas or electricity to do something a little elbow grease and a rake can do.


(tell me you get this)

Also, I cannot afford a leaf blower.


I'm making meatloaf right now for my wife on Mother's day. I used a recipe that did not have measurements and I added too much mustard. I'm hoping it will be okayh. But it means that I've been spending the past hour, on Mother's Day, wondering if I cut the mustard enough.


If you're ever listening to someone spout Bible Hate about homosexuals, please remind them that Leviticus 18:22 says "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination." but Leviticus 19:19 says "...neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee" and ask them if they're wearing a blend.

That is all.

Martin Jetpack: 90 Seconds of Untouchable Awesome

That's right folks, not for another year or so:



I keep thinking he's going to land feet first with the momentum still carrying the pack forward as the engine throttle is released, crushing him into meatbag mash.

Of course, then he would re-animate and we'd have a jet-pack zombie, which is deliciously horrifying.

Ah, Teens and Their Porn

One of the first trips I made on the internets this morning was to MSNBC. I saw the above graphic and read Teens Cutting Back on Porn. "Really?" I thought.

So I continued my visual scan: Like others, Elkhart's porn culture feels recession.

Sounded interesting, but I was not necessarily interested enough to click. "Guess the recession's hitting just about everything," I thought.

About ten minutes and half a cup of coffee later I looked at it again and my brain corrected its Freudian slip.

Obama Makes a Stand to Help Teen Pregnancy

Found at Think Progress:

Keeping with a campaign pledge “not continue to fund abstinence-only programs,” President Obama’s 2010 budget — further details of which were released today — cuts funding for “Community-Based Abstinence Education” and several other abstinence-education programs

Finally, someone who understands that "Just Say NO" doesn't work.

Thank you President Obama for killing stupidity.

This is kind of how today feels...

I've just decided to switch our Friday schedule to Monday, which means that the test we take each Friday on what we learned during the week will now take place on Monday before we've learned it. But since today is Tuesday, it doesn't matter in the slightest. Pencils ready!

Name the movie without Google and I'll Photoshop you an award! Cheers!

A Couple Items to Catch the Eye

Ah, Good ol' Gordon Brown, PM of Britain, in an unfortunate juxtaposition to a high school project.



Brilliant.


The UK has said Michael Savage is banned from the UK. Michael Savage will officially reply with litigation. Michael Savage's real name is Michael Weiner. I do not believe Mr. Weiner would leave the loose borders of his beloved America. And WHY do news resources such as The Independent keep using the almost-hip sunglasses pic of Mr. Weiner when the following is an old pic?



The man is about 2 weeks from meat falling off the bone.



...and he looks like Sam from Today's Special.



US teacher broke law by describing creationism as 'superstitious nonsense'

Judge rules remark was 'improper disapproval of religion' and violated first amendment of US constitution.

Good on that teacher. Of course, he should have just said that it has no base in scientific fact and no place in public schools. And he probably should've been a science teacher. European history? Kind of a stretch, even if I completely agree with his statement.